Don't anybody talk to me and try to influence me - I have got to find a sign somewhere. Tea leaves, clouds, Magic 8 Ball...there has to be a sign somewhere that will show me what decision to make.
I asked God, but as of yet he hasn't shown me anything apparent enough to read, if he has shown me anything at all.... I truly believe in signs, you just have to know how to read them. Is there something I am missing right in front of me?
I went to the gym, and it came back and got me this evening- the leg pain. the left leg - I've been taking care of it doing what I think I should be doing, but it got me tonight in a very bad way. Last week I had no problem with the 370 squat. I knew I could have done two consecutive, but didn't, so this week I was going to do those 2. The 320's s went down and came back up perfectly. No problem. I went down with the 370 and the best way I can describe it is like the tension on something just before you are about to snap it in half...couple that with a hard pain, not sharp, not throbbing, but hard.
My right side wanted to push that bar up, but the left one - no fucking way. I was down, and if wasn't for GW, I wouldn't have come back up.
So I'm looking for the sign - I've either got to drop the weight to be able to pursue the squatting, or I'll retain the size and shape and even grow again, but squat no more....
Maybe I'll flip a coin in the morning...I don't know... I'm upset and very beside myself right now.
Signing off to go wallow -